It’s probably a natural point to reach as a new Mom who is trying to figure out this whole parenting thing, plus continuing to run my own business in a totally different-than-normal year, but I’m really finding myself having to preach grace to myself over and over. As I sit here balancing a baby on my lap while playing some fun tunes to keep him entertained and simultaneously trying to write what’s on my heart, one thing is certain….I’m beginning to learn the art of juggling, both literally and figuratively. Balancing more than one task at a time, and more than one role in life.

Motherhood and the wedding industry have one huge thing in common: there is an endless supply of opinion on how you should be managing your role. You definitely should do this and NEVER do that. You’re awesome if you listen to that expert, but not if you follow that one. You mean you’ve never considered this? Oh, and you haven’t read that book? You probably won’t make it. You might just fail if you don’t keep up. And you’re probably ruining your child/business while you’re at it, too.

I find myself having the same temptations to worry whether I’m reading a parenting book, or the latest post on what’s trending in the wedding industry. There’s this insane pressure to live up to how everyone else is doing it and since you just can’t – because there will never be enough time or energy to please everyone or do ALL the things someone says you should – it instantly turns into feelings of fear or failure. All of the “maybe I should be doing that” thoughts that make you question your own intuition and make you wonder if you were ever cut out for this to begin with. How will I ever have all of the time to get it right? To keep up with everyone else? The reality is I won’t. But what I’m realizing is that I don’t even want to or need to. What I want is to be content being who I’m supposed to be in these roles, not who someone else is. But oh, how much harder that is to do than say.

I’m so grateful for the extended weekend and the fun we had, and for the chance to think through these pressures I’ve been putting on myself. I will never be able to find fulfillment in killing myself trying to keep up with so-and-so. Whether in business or parenting….or life in general. It’s a tireless, fruitless, futile effort and I don’t want to fall into that trap. But it’s hard not to when it feels like the world around you is screaming so many different things.

All I can do is try to take it one day at a time, and remember Whose voice is the most important. The Lord has gifted me with this business, crafted uniquely around me and what I can bring to the table for my clients, which may or may not be like the other businesses around me. He has blessed me with the sweetest baby boy I could have ever hoped for, and that alone makes me the perfect fit to be his Mom. All I can do is seek His guidance as I make decisions daily and learn what works for me in these roles. To allow Him to mold me into the mother and business owner He’s asked me to be, because that’s what I have the grace for.

So if you’re fighting and working hard to achieve the dream you think you’re supposed to have, or to become the person/business owner/parent/whathaveyou that you think you’re supposed to be…..stop for a second and make sure it’s what YOU actually feel called to. If it’s not? Be brave enough to start casting those pressures aside and willing to seek out who YOU are called to be in your roles in life. That’s the life worth living and working hard for.